they said i just lack of confidence ?

well, well next monday will become a big deal for my senior because there are the national exams and i ever told you that i'm falling in love with my senior right ? because of that i really depressed and hopeless. i don't know what must i do. my other senior said that he'll help me, but it became dilemma *like mister said* and my friends also said i must say 'good luck' to him. heem maybe i just a loser that always hope but never try to reach it, well i know it. i'm not tell you that i'm crying because i haven't seen him 2 weeks yet. ya that's right ! the stupidest thing i've ever do

and today i gathered my courage to send him a message about 'good luck with your exams' *maybe you'll think i'm that stupid*. i doubt that time, should i send him or not ? but my friends force me then i sent it. i really hopeless, i never expected he would gave a reply even it just one sentence but it really made me happy, he typed my name ! for me it was really special. maybe for him it was nothing but for me it was everything

my chairmate said that i just lack of confidence and i built a great wall, i wanna close to him but i build a separate wall. ya she was right because there's something like 'know yourself' or 'who do you're' heem it's like a diference of level. i always think that i don't match with him. Allah just what should i do ? maybe i already become an ungrateful person but thank you, i just say subhanaallah for your gift these day ahaha

something i do to waste my time

ahahaha, you know what !?
when you read this post *is there someone ?* and you see the time when i post this post, you'll realize that i wasn't attending to school, heeem maybe you think i truant.well, it is true but the fact is i woke up late *is it same ?* because my alarm didn't ring this morning.

do you know ? my damn school created damn rules for those who come late to school. i prefer stay at home than i must get i punishment *sigh* because i'll get a same point if i force myself to come to school. who want to being lectured a same advice by teacher ? that is so booored~ furthermore, my parents allowed it :p sooo~ no problem

i wonder how's my friends doing at school, ahahaha

trying something new isn't worst at all even we get a disaster after that

first subject of today is JAPANESE, yeaaaay~

japanese subject today is totally different as usual because we cooked sushi *yes, sushi !* altough it was a simple sushi-kani 'crab' sushi and salmon sushi. it was damn fun ahaha, for the first time i ate sushi, huaaaang TT^TT *cries*. i guess raw salmon and crab are disgusting but those are delicious, not fishy at all. because of that our class became messy ahaha and shoyu smell everywhere ahaha

after that we went to hell

<<< DEUTCH EXAAAM~

nooo, i wasn't study yet. God help me ! i wonder what about the result huaaaa TT^TT why i was not a foreigner since beginning ==" sigh, there's nowhere i can complain about that or if i insist to do that i'll called as ungrateful person.

alice in the wonderland

finally, i watched alice in the wonderland. that story was interesting since beginning and i always want to draw the charaters from its but i don't know who they are.

well,
well,
well,
i'll tell you about how i can watch that movie.
first of all, i planned to watch alice in the wonderland with all of 11th language class's student and indonesia subject's teacher and that's all ruined because a lot of them didn't have money *sigh* and the teacher watch another movie with japanese's teacher. totally damn. then i watch the movie with tiara, ratna and her sister, bunga, winda and her boyfriend, and ihsan.

and my opinion about the movie are~

that movie really damn awesome !



Jhonny Depp act *did i spell it right ?* as madhatter, huaaang my favourite character in alice in the wonderland, his act is really good, as expected from jhonny depp. the costume that alice wears is really cute. both of the queen are so funny too and chesire cat is annoying as usual ahaha

at first i guessed it would be a serious movie *hem, how to explain it ya ?* and then it's a comedy *aaa, i confuse how to tell you*

i want to watch it again BUT there's a financial problem ahaha

and now, i want to read its novel, heeeem. wonder where i can find it

RRI; speech contest

yaaay~

i attended japanese speech contest today. it was awesome ! the participants really are talented. they spoke like a real one. i felt like watching anime. heeem, i guess when i can speech like them.
i feel lil' bit envy, but i believe they're can't do the same as me-drawing-even i can't draw properly but someday i'll be a pro ahahahaha *just dreaming as usual nata~*

his birthday and my third-love song-concert

hueeeeee, 2nd march is his birthday but i couldn't gave him a present.
i feel like the stupidest person ever. i 've been saving my money and i planned to give him a cake as his present but-but-but my money wasn't enough to buy him a cake. why cake is really expansive, does it knows i want to buy a wonderful cake, haah !? and my plan is ruined suddenly.

not just his birthday, today i had a little concert !
it was third concert. the english teacher asked us to sing the beatles's songs and i sang 'love me do'. at the english subject's time, he had a sport subject ! i wished he can saw my-terrible-cencert BUT he learn at the other place TT^TT. oh my, i chose that song on purpose; i hope he can hear my song even it was terrible but the song is based my love towards him !

i always believe there's nothing futile, but the truth never says like that TT^TT

~~~

actually there're three person who have a birthday on 2 march: he, tiara, and our beloved english teacher ahaha. we celebrated their birthday at the same time

lulung's and ica's birthday

heem today was my friend's birthday, ica and lulung.
i did something that i never did before, heeem i came to lulung's and ica's house in the morning to give them surprise. everyone knows no one can distrub my lovely morning on sunday. but because of my hospitality i did it for my LOVELY friends ahahaa

absolutely i wasn't alone. there were ucit, ceha, deas, and taufik. we bought a cake for them.

we came to lulung's house first. when we arrived at lulung's house-we made a noisy i just feel sorry to her neighbour-lulung wasn't at home *WTH !?* as i tought, "what if lulung isn't at home ? because we didn't confirm her mother that we want to give her surprise". daaaamn ! her mother said lulung went out with her beloved boy friend, nanda. what ! in the morning ? she said lulung and nanda jogged at monas *well i've bad experience about jogged at monas alone*. at first, we wanted to went to ica's house and back to lulung's house at noon because no one of us asked ica, she is at home or not. but lulung's mother said we can wait for her a while then she phoned lulung with a little act she blamed lulung.

it took a while, we hide in lulung's bedroom. huaaaaa, hurry up ! or we were gonna die~ it was too hot =="
JAAN JAAN JAAAANG, i heard lulung's voice. i knew she felt annoyed because her mother distrub her date, ahaha *feel it !* when lulung opened her door, "TARAAAAA~ ! HAPPY BIRTHDAY LULUNG !" we sang a birthdai's dong and suddenly she cried without a reason ahahaha, so funny XP. we gave her our present, she really wanted have a handmade shirt, so we drew 'happy birthday' her shirt.

well, we didn't have much time left, so we decided to go to ica's house and lulung also join.

after we arrived at ica's house we did the same as lulung's we sang "HAPPY BIRTHDAY ICAA~" and she felt really surprised but not like lulung ica didnt cry but she really never expected we were coming to her house *well, it is a surprise since beginning, isn't it ?* and we also gave her a cake *absolutely different cake* and a present.
and theeen, we spent our half day in ica's house, we made a mess in her bedroom ahaha, sorry ica i just aim to do it ahahaha

~I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST~